the despondent

Justine Greening, Secretary of State for Transport, yesterday uncovered plans to replace Railtrack with a company made of Lego. "We have listened to rail users and we have drawn up a solution that meets both their needs and those of the taxpayer. Railtrack has failed us. I believe that in LegoTrack we have found that company. I will stake my job on it - on the line, if you'll excuse the pun."

She went on to outline the advantages of the scheme: "Lego is cheap, plentiful and easy to use. Even my son, Myles, who is four and has no arms can use it. The LEGO brand is an integrated universe of experiences contributing to more fun and play. We could have throwbots and everything - the possibilities are endless."

It is thought that all trains will carry spare track with them in case of emergencies. Where, for instance, there is a leaf, passengers could assist the driver in building a new track around the leaf.

- Rex Phibb -