US Air Force Grounded over DVT Claims

They call it the Land of Litigation, the United Lawsuits of America, and now the crazy ol’ US of A is set to take the quest for colossal claims to new levels. Rock Schmicker, a partner of Florida law firm Bale Schmicker Bale, is co-ordinating a multi-million dollar law-suit against the US Air Force. Scmicker said they are "happy to offer a No-Win, No-Fee service to terror suspects at the Guantanamo Bay naval base, after they received inadequate hospitality on transfer flights from Afghanistan.

"What these people went through on the transfer flights is simply unacceptable. They were unnecessarily exposed to the risk of Deep Vein Thrombosis (DVT), and we believe they have strong grounds for a claim", said Schmicker yesterday. He claims that, although the prisoners were issued with earphones when they boarded the planes to Guantanamo, and were offered a glass of wine with their meals, the US Air Force stewards blatantly failed to adopt any procedures to advise passengers of the alleged risks inherent in long periods of inactivity.

Donald Rumsfeld dismissed the claims as "bogus and hypocritical". He told journalists at a press conference this morning: ""I do not feel the slightest concern at their treatment. They are being treated vastly better than they have treated anybody themselves. Have you flown Air Afghan lately?"

- Rex Phibb -